Happy Birthday?

Happy Birthday to ME!

But whats to be happy about?! well...aside from working on my natalday, then travelling around the metro like a harrassed indiv! i got called a lying...well, to be more precise, i was told i wasnt doing what i was doing! (thinking of a word for it) oh well... i guess, its not a happy birthday after all...

But enough ranting, i guess i should still be thankful for my blessings this year, my family, my new job, my friends, and of course, the people dear to me... although sometimes, those dear to me are my source of unhappiness...

Hay...i hope something good comes out of this day, i went on a major presentation after my not so sumptuous yet slightly expensive dinner on top of one of the buildings in salcedo overlooking the makati area towards laguna bay care of a good friend. At least with the irritation im feeling right now, i get a sale out of my presentation!

Anyways, i also got to meet some distant cousins tonight... its nice to meet people related to you... family circle gets bigger, its funny, im closer to my relatives than with my own family, its sad... i guess its the culture... but its okay, were okay naman.

OH well, im just writing again whatever comes to mind... im just a bit pissed i guess, i dont know, irritated?! im not sure... maybe mad a lil bit... oh well, i guess happy birthdays are just for kids...if you get older, its just another day in your life. ='(

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Intrusion of Privacy

How would you feel if someone you hold dear goes thru your personal stuff... a diary... a planner... your cellphone... your message archive! ....and take this! his reason, kasi i wasnt being honest with him daw! what do you guys think? is that reason enough to intrude into someone elses affairs?

and heres the deal... 50% of what he actually read and what he told me... is wrong! of course... everything is open for interpretation... hay... woe is me... and if i did lie to him... i still dont think its justified... what do you think? better yet tell me what to do... because right now i just want to kick his ass! i am so pissed its not even funny! and hurting....geez...i really feel bad and sick! =_(

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Journey to Love

The end... end of an era, end of something, end of a phase.... well guys... just a few minutes ago a part of my life, a phase, a chapter, a page... just closed.

Well.. that about explains why I have been on a hiatus for quite a while.... aside from work and travel... i have somewhat tried to work on my emotional needs. But i guess... i am just too much of a man to be "caged" as he said.... i really dont know... i guess... either i am stupid to be dominant or was less of a man to be submissive... either way, its all over... i dont know what will come next

Needless to say... i can categorize this phase as a journey to the unknown... its safe to say that i have loved, but was never in a relationship... my past entries shows that it always ended nowhere... somehow this one i was hopeful... but am not as open to give in...for i am scared to be hurt in the end and hurt the other person in the process.

Im sure he will read this entry one of these days and as i promised.... no mention of him will be done. In any case... it was a series of events that have led to the eventual demise of feelings, both me and him, i suppose. Trust... not the condom! although that was an issue too =P seriously... i guess... i didnt trust him enough... although i was testing him, testing his character...testing his limits... or maybe he just didnt trust me as much as i thought he would.

To be caged? to be guarded... is fine... but up to a certain extent... i have been a wild stallion since i started and i like to go out and have fun... but lately... i am happier with travelling with him and chillin at home or at a resto... actually, he just cant believe that its me...he thinks its all for show. Maybe he knows me more than myself...i dont know...or maybe his sources have hacked my brain already so they know me more than myself...

It was fun while it lasted... a learning experience... i guess... i have never felt more loved and cared for... felt secure and protected... its funny now that i think about it... i act like a baby around him... which is something that no one gets to see... people always think of me as prim, proper and stern at times =( but i guess... i really felt comfortable around the guy so i can act silly, childish and stupid.

I guess... it wasnt meant to be and it had to end abruptly... on the other hand, its a good thing too since i have sort of been dependent on him for things... which normally i wouldnt.... well... you know who you are... and i just want to thank you for everything, i mean everything... its true, no one would have done the things that you have done and i am very thankful for having the chance to be with you for the last 4 months or so.

Hayy... im just blabbering... i guess this is still fresh from the oven! so... i might miss out on some important details...but i guess... in the end... he is really a nice guy... he kinda reminded me of me...and i turned out to be the bad guy... =( oh well... i was his first...and he was mine... (its for our own interpretation)

i miss the guy now =( ...but i guess like all journeys...it has to come to an end....

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Wentletrap Resurrected

After a hiatus of a week or so mostly due to work and i was out of the big city... and some other things im back... i thought why should i let things affect me for whatsoever reason...anyways... ill be posting more stuff soon. =)

i have a few things up my sleeve.. hmm... something to look forward to, i guess...

well a lil something something from the past couple of weeks... for starters im sort of enjoying my new job, hint hint... i dispose of properties! hehehe.... high end properties... anybody interested???

...i have been going back and forth to Bicol.... well mostly work... but i get to relax on the weekend, talk about REEE...lax! actually more like hibernate...i slept for the bulk of the weekends... hours on end... only waking up to pee or eat and well...wash my face! but other than that... i loooove...just rolling over my bed or my parents bed... or any bed i end up sleeping in... cuddling my 20 year old pillow that has been all over the world! hehehe.... disclaimer... i only was it twice a year... and that is just the pillow case... i dont like my pillow washed... it will loose its specialness! hehehe...and there are only two pillow case in existence! soo... the older the better! ...hehehe... gross??? i dont think so! hehehe.. its worth a kings ransom! and besides... others have a security blanky... i have a 20 yo pillow! ... i just love to run my hands thru it, scratching it like a kitty kat! hehehe... my mom hates me when i do it... and i do it subconsciously.... she likens it to me strumming a guitar...hehehe... anyways... i just thought of writing about it since she wanted to throw it out when i visited them last weekend, kasi it looks old and mabaho na daw =(

so there... i just arrived again this morning fresh from Bicol...and i had training earlier, small world, my trainer was a co-varsity of mine back in college... he looks matanda na! hahaha... i guess because of his dominant Euro blood... well im still thankful that mine isn't as dominant...hheheh you gotta love em Asians they look way younger than their age... =P

thats all for now...

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